The biggest resistance piece I hear from people in therapy sessions, particularly mothers, is that self-care is selfish. In this article I want to address a few common misconceptions or myths about self-care, and reiterate to you the importance of a regular, consistent self-care practice. Self-care is one of the kindest acts you can gift yourself and those you care about.

Common Myths About Self-Care

01 | Self-care is selfish

Making time for self-care allows you space to restore your energy and re-centre yourself. this enables you to show up more fully as the person you want to be each day for both yourself and for those around you.

02 | Self-care is expensive

You don't need to buy a new face cream, book a retreat, or sign up to a yoga studio in order to practice self-care. Simple actions like meditation, getting to bed early, or even running the dishwasher twice, can all be low-cost acts of self-care.

03 | Self-care is time-consuming

whether you are a parent or not, we all feel pushed for time regularly. But you don’t need to dedicate a lot oftime to a self-care practice for it to be effective. Even micro-moments of self-care practice throughout your day are beneficial.

04 | Self-care must be earned

Self-care is a basic human right. you do not need to have worked a full, productive day, be on the brink of burnout or tick off helping others in order to give yourself some care.

05 | Self-care is only for women

Despite what common marketing campaigns might have you believe; healthy routines and nurturing activities are gender neutral. They should be prioritised by both men and women.

RUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE

In point 02 above I suggested ‘running the dishwasher twice’. I first read about this idea in an article published last year by Mamamia. The article told the story of a woman who went to see her therapist and when he asked her what she was struggling with, she answered honestly ... that she was struggling with the dishes. She explained that her sheer overwhelm with life had reached its peak with a sink full of dirty dishes and a complete lack of desire to rinse or scrub the dishes before they went in the dishwasher.

So her therapist suggested she break the rules of society: skip the rinsing and just run the dishwasher twice. The therapist gave her permission to abolish the invisible rules and go through the motions as loosely as is necessary in order to gain some momentum in her life. So that is what she did. Just for a few weeks. Just as long as she needed to for the fog to clear a little, and her overwhelm to reduce to a point where she felt capable of rinsing the dishes again. You can read the original article here.

Now I am aware that running the dishwasher twice is not the best advice from an environmental standpoint! But my point here is simple. On days when your mental health needs a little extra support, do whatever you need to do to help you get through the day with a bit more grace and care for yourself. Let go of internal or external standards or expectations which may stand in your way.

Self-care doesn't need to be glamorous or expensive. It can be as simple as running the dishwasher twice ⋒

If you found this useful, you may also like to read:

Self-Care Matters Because You Matter - where I dive into the difference between proactive and reactive self-care (you need both!) &, in case you need convincing, outline the key benefits of treating yourself with kindness and care.
Value-Based Self-Care: What it is and Why you need it - where I share a simple but effective three-step strategy for identifying your why. Establishing clarity on this will help to cultivate motivation and a more consistent and committed practice of self-care. Thus, more benefits!

For more clinical psychology strategies and resources, sign up to my fortnightly newsletter, Unfrazzled, your go-to source for refuge in the chaos. Each edition curates a blend of psychological insights, practical tips, and inspiration to help you untangle the knots of modern life ⋒

GET UNFRAZZLED