Twelve Days of Mental Fitmas

Christmas tree sparkly lights 12 days of fitmas

Alongside the joy and sparkle, the festive period can bring unique challenges and stresses for us to navigate. So it is more important than ever to focus on nurturing and enhancing your mental well-being in the run up to Christmas.

That is why I have created my “12 days of Mental Fitmas” programme for you. Although the official twelve days of Christmas fall from the 25th December through to January 6th, I want you to have the tools to navigate the weeks leading up to the big day as well. So here is my gift to you this holiday season.

Below are twelve mental health boosting strategies proven to nourish your mind, mood, health and relationships, as well as enhance your psychological resilience. I promise you, these strategies will help you to not only survive the festive season, but to thrive your way through it!

1 | PUT ON SOME MUSIC AND DANCE

Music and dance has existed for thousands of years, having become very popular forms of creative expression and physical activity. Dancing can allow you to feel liberated, reduce cortisol levels caused by chronic stress and release happy hormones such as dopamine and endorphins.

More benefits of dancing include:

Enhances confidence and self-worth
Allows you to communicate with others and meet new people
Improves your mood
Helps with feelings of sadness and anxiety symptoms
Improves your memory
Improves brain function

So get some Christmas tunes on and get moving!

2 | TAKE YOURSELF OUT ON A DATE

"Me time" can enhance patience, increase sleep, and reduce stress. So why not treat yourself to a movie date, a dinner date, a walk, or a road trip while listening to your favorite music?

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”
– Lucille Ball

The power of “me time” and spending time with yourself is often underestimated and in a world where we never stop moving, it can feel impossible to take some time out for ourselves.

Therefore, it is important that sometimes we learn to say no, and schedule in some ever-so-important time with ourselves. Me-time and putting your own needs first can help improve self confidence, relieve stress and improve relationships.

So since it’s Christmas, make sure to pencil yourself in for a walk in the countryside on your own, treat yourself to a dinner, or go for a hot chocolate in a cosy cafe. Whatever makes you happy!

3 | CREATE A GRATITUDE LIST

Positive psychology research has shown that gratitude can improve both physical and mental health, with people who have been found to “count their blessings” reportedly feeling happier and less depressed (NAMI, 2020).

With Christmas coming up, we often need to remind ourselves to give thanks and feel gratitude for all that we have.

Some ways to keep track of gratitude include:

Journalling
Voice noting or texting yourself three things you feel grateful for each day
Download a gratitude app (Such as @gratefulness.me, @thinkupapp or @365gratitudejournal)

You can use prompts to make this easier for yourself, such as “A person I feel grateful for is…” “An experience I am grateful for is…” “A place I am grateful for is…”

4 | CONNECT WITH A LOVED ONE

Social support is one of the strongest protective factors against ill mental health. Not only does emotional connection give us an increased sense of meaning and purpose in life, but research has shown that social support can bolster resilience during stressful situations (Loseth, 2022).

Almost all of us will benefit from having some kind of social and emotional support in our lives. This is because having a strong social support system will improve your self-esteem and sense of autonomy, meaning you are more likely to be able to handle difficult problems on your own.

Remember there are many ways you can connect, or reconnect, with loved ones at Christmas, even if it may have been a while.

You can:

Invite them round to your house
Ask if you can pop round to visit them
Invite them out for dinner or to do an activity together
Call, text or even better… video chat
To hold out an olive branch, send them a Christmas card

5 | SAY NO

Although saying yes can sometimes feel good, and saying no can feel daunting, saying no is an important part of self-care. Setting and maintaining boundaries will enhance your psychological resilience, self-esteem and confidence.

Saying no can make space for your own needs and what is best for you. It teaches you to stop saying no to your own needs and desires, for the sake of others. Have a think about different ways of saying no and which way feels most natural to you. If you are stuck, try using the sandwich method; sandwich the “no” between two positive comments or sentences.

Here are some examples you can use:

“Thank you for inviting me, I really appreciate you including me. I won't be able to make it. But I would love to meet up at some point soon instead.”
“I really appreciate the invite, unfortunately I won't be able to come but I hope you have an amazing time.”
“Thank you so much for considering me, unfortunately I really can't take on anymore work this Christmas, but I'd love the opportunity to work with you so please do reach out again in the future.”

6 | MEDITATE

Mindfulness and meditation can bring you a feeling of calm, peace and balance in your life, that will benefit your emotional well-being and overall health. It is a great tool for helping you to stay present, feel relaxed, focused and cope better with stressors. Regular mediation has been proven to reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression.

How to meditate:

First, find a quiet space which allows you to feel calm and comfortable. You may want to turn on some calming music, try a guided meditation, or you may prefer to meditate in silence.
Set yourself a time limit (start with just two minutes per day)
Begin by just noticing your breath as it travels in and out of your body.
Be aware of thoughts coming in and going out of your mind and give permission for your mind to wander.
When you notice it wandering, gently direct your attention back to your breath.
Be kind and non-judgemental if/when your mind wanders, but always try to refocus back to the present moment using your breath as an anchor.

When you first start meditation, it can be helpful to try it with guidance, perhaps from a teacher or group practice. There are also some really helpful apps available which can help you to practise meditation, such as Calm, Headspace, or for a free option, try Healthy Minds Innovations.

7 | EAT MINDFULLY

When was the last time you sat and mindfully ate a meal? We are so used to the daily rush, we can often forget to appreciate our food in the moment. Our daily meals are the perfect opportunity to take a moment to practise mindfulness, and ground ourselves in the present moment.

Mindful eating is the practice of staying present and maintaining in-the-moment awareness of the food and drink you are consuming. You can do this by observing your senses as you eat, how the food is making you feel emotionally and what signals your body is sending in response to its experience - pleasure, satisfaction, fullness etc.

How to eat mindfully:

Find a quiet, peaceful and calm place to eat
Remove any distractions (no phones or TV!)
Tune in to all five of your senses, one by one
Notice how your food looks, how it smells, how it feels in your mouth, how it sounds, and finally, how it tastes
Eat and chew slowly and intentionally
Stop when you notice the sensation of fullness

Regular mindful eating can be a powerful way to train your attention and awareness to be present-focused, a skill which often gets neglected as we navigate the stresses of daily life. And it can be a fantastic way to introduce mindfulness into your life, without the need to carve out extra time! Research has shown it to be associated with improved digestion, weight management and enhanced food enjoyment - win, win!

8 | HAVE SOME "ME-TIME"

“Me-time” is critical for good mental health. It can help you de-stress and unwind, boost self-esteem, reboot productivity, allow time for reflection and self-discovery, and improve your overall health and wellbeing.

But when was the last time you intentionally spent an evening doing exactly what you wanted to do? Doing something and being somewhere solely for the purpose of meeting your own needs and desires, and not those of others. Has it been a while? If so, you’re not alone. So often, the demands of work, relationships, parenting and house management get prioritised.

Planning “Me-Time”:

Start by brainstorming what it is you most want and/or need at this moment in time. Is it rest? Relaxation? Movement? Laughter? Creativity? Education? Get clear on what you need and then create an actionable plan of how you can achieve those things.
Identify any potential obstacles (external and internal) standing in your way and figure out how you might overcome them. Such as, arranging childcare (external), blocking some time out in your work diary (external) or challenging unhelpful thoughts which tell you it’s selfish to put your needs first (internal). If you get stuck, ask a friend or loved one what they would do in the same situation
Map out your entire afternoon/evening based on what you have identified you want or need.

9 | TAKE A MINDFUL WALK

Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your attention to the present. A fantastic way to practise this - whilst also getting some movement in - is by taking a mindful walk; a walk where you ground your attention in the present moment and your surroundings.

Try practising the “5 Senses Exercise” as you stroll:
Pause, take a breath and notice…

FIVE things you can see (e.g. trees, leaves, birds, buildings, cars...)
FOUR things you can physically fee (e.g. your feet pressed in your shoes, the sun on your face, the wind in your hair...)
THREE things you hear (e.g. the sound of cars, the wind, children laughing…)
TWO things you can smell (e.g. farm smells, petrol, food stalls you pass…)
ONE thing you can taste (e.g. dry mouth, toothpaste, lingering taste of your morning tea/coffee…)

10 | HAVE A SOCIAL-MEDIA FREE DAY

Social media can sometimes feel like the ideal place to escape from reality, reduce boredom and connect with others. However, multiple studies have identified a strong correlation between heavy social media use and increased risk of depression, anxiety, loneliness, self-harm, and even suicidal thoughts.

This is because as well as the positives, social media can often promote negative experiences within us, such as thoughts of inadequacy, social comparison, feeling like you're missing out, cyberbullying and difficulties with body image. Furthermore, excessive screen time has been associated with sleep disruption, obesity, unhealthy eating and headaches. Therefore, I recommend scheduling a social-media free day. Turn off your phone or put it on “do not disturb” and take a break from your screen and non-stop scrolling. If a whole day seems too challenging, try a few hours. Even a short break from it will benefit you.

Some of the benefits you might experience include:

Reduced stress and anxiety
Increased attention span
Increased productivity
More time to enjoy simple pleasures
Reduced feelings of loneliness
Feeling more connected to the natural world
The ability to be more present

11 | HAVE AN EARLY NIGHT

One of the biggest problems with missing out on sleep, is that it can cause our amygdala to go into overdrive. Meaning sleep is closely connected to our mental and emotional health. Did you know that sleep even has demonstrated links to depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and other mental health conditions?

In fact, a poor night's sleep can actually become part of a vicious mental health cycle…

Lack of sleep → Tiredness → Difficulties coping with daily life → Low self-esteem → Feelings of worry and stress → Lack of sleep.

Here are some of my favourite tips that have been proven to improve your sleep health:

Consistency. Set yourself a bedtime and stick to it daily.
Make your bedroom your sanctuary, a place where your mind and body feel calm, relaxed and at peace.
Practice mindfulness prior to bedtime to calm your mind from busy thoughts.
Ditch the screen time before bed.
Keep active during the day.
Avoid large meals, caffeine and alcohol close to bedtime.

12 | TAKE A SELF-COMPASSION BREAK

Self-compassion is the process of turning compassion inward toward yourself. It is the practice of being kind and understanding, instead of being self-critical and harsh on ourselves. In particular, when we make a mistake, fail, get rejected or feel like we aren't good enough, self-compassion involves giving yourself support and encouragement when difficulty arises. Such as, praising ourselves for what we have overcome or achieved so far, rather than criticise ourselves for what we have not yet accomplished. Therefore, I encourage you to try this self-compassion exercise (created by the Co-Founder of the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion; Dr Kristin Neff) in order to evoke self-compassion within yourself when a difficult situation arises.

Think of a difficult situation that has caused you stress in your life. Bring the situation to the forefront of your mind, and see if you can feel the stress and emotional discomfort that you felt in that moment, in your body.
Say to yourself (be mindful): “This is a moment of suffering”. Other options: "This hurts" "Ouch" "This is stress".
Say to yourself (remind yourself it's part of common humanity) ”Suffering is a part of life”.
Put your hands on top of your heart, feel the warmth and gentleness of your hands on your chest and adopt a soothing touch.
Say to yourself “May I be kind to myself” Or consider exactly what you need to hear right now to express kindness to yourself? Is there a specific phrase that you resonate with, such as:
"May I give myself the compassion that I need"
"May I learn to accept myself as I am"
"May I forgive myself"
"May I be strong"
"May I be patient"