5 Effective Strategies for Coping After a Trauma
Self-compassion and self-care is vital for any trauma survivor and can have significant benefits. Self-care is not just having a bath or an occasional massage. The essence of self-care is making an intentional choice to care for ourselves in the best way we can in the moment. It has proven physical and psychological health benefits.
Usual self-care habits are typically dropped in the immediate aftermath of something traumatic; the shock of a trauma temporary paralyses us from continuing ‘as normal’. Self-care can seem too effortful, unimportant or pointless. However, this is not what the research shows. Even engaging in fleeting moments of self-care will have a huge impact on your recovery. It can feel empowering to take a degree of control back following a situation which has felt completely unsafe, unpredictable and out of control.
01 | Grounding Strategies
Distressing memories or nightmares of a trauma can leave you feeling like you’re “reliving” it. It can feel as if the event is happening again now in the present, and not in the past. Feelings and thoughts you had at the time of the trauma may come back.
Grounding strategies are tools which facilitate the grounding of yourself in the present moment. They increase your sense of safety and control.
Some grounding strategies to try:
Look at a recent photo or video of someone or something that makes you feel safe
Smell a soothing perfume or scent
Drink an ice cold drink
Listen to calming music or a podcast
Talk with a friend or loved one
Seek out or give yourself physical comfort
02 | Sleep, Rest & Relaxation
The body’s hyper-aroused state post-trauma makes these three tasks very difficult. But they are vital to your recovery.
Try to maintain good sleep habits:
Avoid digital technology at least 30 minutes before bedtime
Maintain a regular nightly wind down routine
Ensuring your bedroom feels a safe and comfortable space
Relaxing essential oils can be helpful, try a diffuser or put a few drops on your pillow (just ensure the scent has no association with your trauma)
If nightmares wake you, get out of bed, turn a light on, walk around &, if possible, seek comfort from a loved one. Recite a pre-prepared soothing statement, such as “I am safe now”, to help ground you in the present moment.
In the absence of sleep, rest and relaxation can be a beneficial substitute.
Make a list of activities which you think might provide a sense of calm and peace. Then work through your list. Ideas could include taking a candlelit bath, enjoying a soothing book or TV programme, appreciating a pleasant view, meditation, gentle yoga or stretching.
Choose activities that are truly restful to you and try not to be influenced by what you or others think you should find relaxing. What is relaxing to one person may feel the opposite for another.
03 | CONNECTION & Social Support
You may feel an urge to withdraw from others, and whilst some alone time may be important for rest and relaxation, too much of it can be unhelpful.
Surround yourself with people with whom you feel safe, validated and cared for.
Tell them what you need in that moment (be it a cooked meal or a big hug) - don’t assume they know.
Embrace the support that comes your way; resist any urge to withdraw from it.
Reach out to support groups or qualifed health professionals if needed
04 | Mood Boosting Activity
Activities which once gave you a sense of pleasure or meaning, often don’t feel like they do anymore following a trauma. This reflects the temporary changes in your body and mind - it is not an indication that these activities can’t be helpful. Acknowledge this and manage your expectations.
Engage in activities you previously enjoyed, even if they don’t feel enjoyable in the moment. This will help to gradually bring back your sense of joy.
Limit activities which could potentially maintain or worsen low mood or anxiety, such as avoidance of certain people, places or conversations.
Consider trying out new activities, such as exercise classes, arts and crafts, singing, dancing or board games.
Try anything you think could help, even if you don’t 100% believe it will in the moment.
05 | MOVEMENT & NUTRITION
Do not underestimate the power of moving and fuelling your body. Changes in appetite following trauma can lead to over or under-eating, or eating different types of food to normal.
Maintain a balanced, healthy diet and good hydration levels.
Try to get up and do some movement every single day. Even a brief, gentle walk will have benefits.
STILL STRUGGLING?
Some common symptoms people often experience following a trauma include:
anxiety, irritability, anger and low mood
negative or critical thoughts
intrusive trauma memories
difficulties with sleep and concentration
a heightened startle response
state of high alert (often called hypervigilance)
avoidance of thoughts, feelings or memories of what happened
Usually, these experiences lessen naturally over time, as the brain and body make sense of what has happened. However, sometimes post-trauma symptoms can develop into mental health problems, such as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), anxiety disorders or depression. If your symptoms persist or you, or others, are worried about them, please do reach out for support. There are some highly effective, evidence-based psychological treatments for trauma. With the right kind of support, it is possible to heal the wounds of a traumatic experience and move forward. Please get in touch if you want to find out more about therapy options, or visit the resources page of this website for further resources and support.